Originally posted on January 14, 2024 @ 12:30 pm
The Golden Bachelor Recap for 9/28/2023
-Our new Golden Bachelor Gerry Turner is looking for the second love of a lifetime. His wife Toni died in 2017 after a brief illness and thanks to his daughters giving their blessings, he is on this new journey.
-So apparently we are jumping right into the meetings, not doing intros?
Intros:
-Edith’s heart has been something waiting to meet him. She throws confetti to celebrate.
-Ellen gives a shout out to her best friend Roberta.
-Sandra uses Zen to calm them down….by dropping F bombs ala My Cousin Vinny.
-Leslie pulls the old lady gag that was used in a previous season…..
-We meet Marina, Christina and Joan way too quickly…..as well as a bunch of other women who we barely get to see.
-Theresa comes in her birthday suit on her birthday….flesh tone undies?
-April brings her fresh eggs from her farm.
-Renee does a cheer based on the nurse chant from Ferris Bueller.
-Maria teaches him how to dance.
-Anna tries to run away with him.
-Susan dresses in a feather dress that Gerry thinks is a wedding dress.
-Patty is former Bachelor Matt Jams’s mom
-More super-quick entrances….including Jimmy Kimmel’s Aunt Chippy who is there for shits and giggles.
-Faith shows up in a motorcycle.
-Jesse gives Gerry a pep talk before he goes in to mingle with the women.
-The mingling begins and the women take turns stealing time with Gerry.
-April makes her a calendar of all April….the month and pictures of her….giving her major Blanche Deveraux vibes. (Remember that episode where she gave them the calendar of her boudoir?
-Ellen thinks that this is the best day of her life so far and tells Roberta he is a hunk.
-Serious question: I know Roberta was in Ellen’s video, but did she pass away or is Ellen just giving updates/shout outs to her through the show?
-Faith also plays the guitar.
-Dance party for no apparent reason!!!!
-I still have no clue who the hell half these women are.
-Everyone is vying for more time so they can get the first impression rose.
-Theresa gets a birthday cupcake.
-Faith gets the first impression rose. Of course. The deal is sealed with a kiss.
-Aunt Chippy sleeping on the couch is such a mood.
Rose Ceremony….and who are half these women?
-Ellen–Roberta’s BFF
-Theresa–Birthday girl
-Joan–No clue
-Natascha–Who?
-Leslie–No idea
-Christina–Still no clue
-Edith–Confetti lady
-Nancy–No idea
-April–Farm lady
-Sandra–Zen My Cousin Vinny
-Jeanie–Pink dress lady
-Kathy–Kept whining about getting a rose in the confessionals and reminds me of Luann from RHONY.
-Marina–In gorgeous outfit.
-Peggy–No idea…did she just show up for the rose ceremony?
Final rose tonight:
-Susan: Kris Jenner lookalike
Eliminated:
-Patty–Matt’s mom
-Anna–Run away with me lady
-Renee–Ferris Bueller cheerleader lady
-Sylvia–There was a Sylvia on here?
-Maria–Dancer
-Pamela–No clue
More next week, stay tuned!!